What’s the point in saying “unameit” (aka ‘you name it’) when you’ve already told the lawn maintenance dude to fuck himself after posting a photograph of his work truck on Facebook? What else is there to say? The guy is simply trying to do his job without being yelled at by a neighbor in the middle of the day. Why should that be so hard?

Yes, it sucks that this is the first shared nap time the boys have had in weeks and it’s been thwarted by outside noise - OF COURSE it sucks. But is it really worth screaming at the guy whose job it is to mow and trim grass for a living? He isn’t exactly in a position to “set his schedule,” if you will, so bitching isn’t going to change anything. Not to mention, it’s the middle of the day. How are people supposed to know how to adjust their work schedules to accommodate a mother’s preferences?

Jeez, people, you’re supposed to be working during the hours that Chastity is shopping! What is everyone doing right now anyway, other than shadowing Chastity’s every move like weird freaks who also enjoy parking close to store entrances and shopping in the afternoon? Chastity shouldn’t have to put up with that, OR stand in long lines with a crying baby, because she has specifically designed her life to move efficiently without others’ intrusion! Whose fault is it that her timing for this particular shopping trip backfired? Hers? I don’t think so. I swear, ppl suk so hard.

Related: Woe Is Mom Complain-O-Rama!

(submitted by Anonymous)

Woe Is Mom: DST Edition

Sometimes I get a submission and my first thought is, “Is this person fucking with me?” I feel like I’m on Candid Camera in my own living room because the submission sounds like an exact duplicate of an old post on the blog, like this one does. I think it’s more common for this overlap to occur with Woe Is Mom submissions because people tend to complain about the same things, but I’m still amused that daylight saving time submissions all sound pretty much identical, as evidenced here, here, and here.

So in that uninteresting and predicable vein, here is this season’s installment of Woe Is DST. It’s a conversation taking place on Facebook walls everywhere that practices the archaic act of shifting the clocks forward, and there’s nothing particularly special about it. Most people hate daylight saving time, but parents of small children hate it the most, and that’s really all you need to know. Blurg.

(submitted by Anonymous)

Woe Is Mom

This submission had me at “Being psychic.” There’s a certain adolescent satisfaction one gets from saying, “What am I, psychic?!!!” that must have inspired Rachel’s phrasing, and it makes her sound all the more ridiculous. I’m surprised she didn’t write her rant in the third person. That’s the only thing missing from this Tale Of Mascot Shunning. Well, that and more quips from crazy old Sharon. I highly recommend reading her “snapped their heads off” line aloud and pausing for dramatic effect on the “maybe…JUST MAYBE” part. How did she even come up with the bit about “sand down their necks”? Is she just a badass with insults or is she the wife of a wiseguy? I’m going to go with both.

Poor Rachel, though. She will never take the hint. Yes, sometimes Billy is adorable. Sometimes he’s a crawling, babbling prince among women’s group. But other times, maybe he could be the mascot of a nearby park with a babysitter? Or the mascot of any place other than women’s group? The group is *technically* for women, after all, and while it sounds like it’s usually pretty kid-friendly, maybe the unspoken (or half-spoken) rule is that it’s kid-friendly most of the time rather than all of the time. And if that is the case, is it really such a bad thing? Yes, kids are a part of our community, but that doesn’t mean they can also be mascots of women’s group. Especially since everyone knows that tampons, Barbie and Cloris Leachman already share that role nationwide. Does Rachel think they’re going to replace those icons with Billy? Please.

(submitted by Anonymous)

PS: Check out an interview I did on the Washington Post blog On Parenting right here!