Ahoy! Today’s a lovely day for a lesson in mommyjacking, is it not?! Over on Mommyish, my column this week focuses on edumacating folks on the art of the mommyjack. Namely, spotting the various types of mommyjackers online when you see them. (And yes, I would be happy to host a game show called ‘Know Your MommyJackers’.) I didn’t cover EVERY type of mommyjacker, since there are new varieties popping up every day and it would be impossible to catalog them all, but I did cover the five “basic” types:

The Classic MommyJacker

YAY!!! Good for you :) And YAY!!! Good for ME!

The Needy MommyJacker

Hormones are a bitch.

The Self-Involved MommyJacker

Does your day feel like it’s never going to end? Sounds like it. Do I care? NOPE! Olivia came home early today and Rachael can type her name! Woo-hoo! She just loves it.

The Self-Righteous MommyJacker

Good grief, Charlie Brown Jj, try popping out a trio of kids, divorcing your loser husband, THEN getting engaged, THEN going through menopause 15 years early, THEN getting unengaged AND planning a move two states away AND having an untreatable and habitual mommyjacking tendency and then let me hear you talk about your “diet”! HAHA, Love you, bro!! :)

The Tired MommyJacker

You don’t KNOW tired until you’re a mom ;) SERIOUSLY. It’s a freaking fact. Just try to out-sleep deprive a mom. You can’t! ;)

To see more examples and read all of my official mommyjacking definitions, head over to Mommyish! 

Related: Last week’s column

(submitted by Anonymous)