Ahh, another Sunday, another Parent Appreciation Holiday. This time around it’s Father’s Day, which gets celebrated on social media with an entirely different range of reactions than on Mother’s Day. On Mother’s Day, you’re a complete jerk if you don’t thank all the mamas (and all the mama’s mamas) for being selfless heroes, but on Father’s Day, anything goes! Newsfeeds become a smattering of “Love you!”s and “Fuck you!”s, and it’s perfectly acceptable to voice whichever “side” you’re on.
Don’t get me wrong, I know there are shitty dads out there. If there’s one thing daytime television has taught me, it’s that there are some dirty dog daddies in this world who would rather risk going to prison than pay child support or emotionally invest in their children. That said, it’s always a bit of a bummer when Father’s Day rolls around and social media turns into an “I hate my child’s father”-fest. And yet conversely, it’s equally annoying when people pile praise on their kid’s dad on Facebook, because it’s like, “Um, aren’t you guys sitting across the kitchen table from each other?” All in all, Father’s Day on social media is anything but one-note — if a little predictable. Let’s check out some dad-driven examples:
1. Cold Stone Love ♥
These two have a marriage filled with love, support, and sundaes. The good stuff. Scott’s comment may go down in history as my favorite sincere statement ever written on Facebook. It also made me kinda hungry.
2. The Thick Of It
If you post that something or someone is “covered in POOP!” (all caps), you shouldn’t follow it up with the expression “in the thick of it.” Also, I’m not really seeing what’s been so hectic about F.’s day? It’s just because she spilled tea all on her new carpet? Who buys brand new light-colored carpet with a young child at home who’s capable of exploding diarrhea everywhere and then gets concerned with a tea stain?
3. Acknowledgement Peeves
SNOT! Everyone knows kids are a part of our community and are not “half-people,” and yet they still get treated like second class citizens by restaurant servers. It’s outrageous! How many times do parents have to shout from
the rafters Facebook, “Acknowledge our children or BE SHAMED!” before the general public wises up? And then for a server to not say “Happy Father’s Day” like some kind of MORON on top of ignoring a precious baby…well, that’s just unacceptable. There are certain things in a server’s job description that are non-negotiable — keeping water glasses full, bringing out food when it’s hot, smiling/waving/blowing kisses at adorable children — and it’s really sad that it’s the parents, not the restaurant managers, who have to point this stuff out.