Slim Patients
Does it ever occur to parents who say things like this that perhaps their “friends” just aren’t interested in seeing them? Because if I was this woman’s “friend,” I don’t think my noticeable absence would be due to not wanting to meet her baby. If anything, I’d probably use her daughter as an excuse to not come by. “Yikes, you must be super busy with the new baby. Hope to see you soon!” translates to “You’ve been a nightmare since you got pregnant. Please get over yourself, then call me.”
Of course, I realize this new mom is just joking around. But everyone knows it’s not REALLY a joke. You can’t just tack ‘Lol’ to the end of an insult and expect your friends to have a nice, hearty laugh. Or, you can, but the status update should probably be about something other than buying your kid gifts.
The moral of the story is this: You can’t force your friends to come meet your baby any more than I can force my local deli guy to lower the price on Aranciata. Yes, your child is growing in myriad ways by the day, but unfortunately some of your friends might not meet her as an infant, as a 2-month-old, or even as an 8-year-old 8-month-old. If it really means that much to you, give them a call and let them know. But the last time I checked, writing passive-aggressive status updates that are punctuated with quirky internet jargon doesn’t do the trick.
PS: “Patients are getting slim”? Please no.
Related: Baby Shower Gift, Hospital Gift, and After-Home Baby Gift
(submitted by Anonymous)

Slim Patients

Does it ever occur to parents who say things like this that perhaps their “friends” just aren’t interested in seeing them? Because if I was this woman’s “friend,” I don’t think my noticeable absence would be due to not wanting to meet her baby. If anything, I’d probably use her daughter as an excuse to not come by. “Yikes, you must be super busy with the new baby. Hope to see you soon!” translates to “You’ve been a nightmare since you got pregnant. Please get over yourself, then call me.”

Of course, I realize this new mom is just joking around. But everyone knows it’s not REALLY a joke. You can’t just tack ‘Lol’ to the end of an insult and expect your friends to have a nice, hearty laugh. Or, you can, but the status update should probably be about something other than buying your kid gifts.

The moral of the story is this: You can’t force your friends to come meet your baby any more than I can force my local deli guy to lower the price on Aranciata. Yes, your child is growing in myriad ways by the day, but unfortunately some of your friends might not meet her as an infant, as a 2-month-old, or even as an 8-year-old 8-month-old. If it really means that much to you, give them a call and let them know. But the last time I checked, writing passive-aggressive status updates that are punctuated with quirky internet jargon doesn’t do the trick.

PS: “Patients are getting slim”? Please no.

Related: Baby Shower Gift, Hospital Gift, and After-Home Baby Gift

(submitted by Anonymous)

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